Tuesday, March 9, 2010

A One Year Journey

Well, Sunday, 7 March was a big day in our home. Our little prince turned one year old; a whole year's journey complete, one which brought his mommy and daddy abundant joy and happiness. It of course was a big day for Lachlan, as we celebrated the day he made his arrival into this world one Saturday morning at 9:32AM when he saw his first glimpse of light and was welcomed with open arms by those who could only dream of what he might look like, who he might become. His birthday is also a big day for me and Lachlan's father. The momentous occasion is obvious for a mother; a day I had been waiting 9 months for wondering what the labour experience was going to be like and how would I handle it. Once Lachlan was born, all of that seemed trivial. I no longer cared about the grouchy mid-wife or the forceps delivery. At that moment, I was a mother. I had finally evolved into this role that I had been waiting for most of my life. A role that we know the meaning of, but soon realise how little we know about it until we become one. All the emotions: the tears of happiness and worry that can consume you...and of course there is that mama bear protective instinct that wishes you could just shield your precious baby from any sadness or pain. My husband felt many of the same feelings, but fatherly and motherly love are very different I believe. We are made up of a completley different balance of hormones after all! For him though, his mind was also consumed with pure love and he too was oblivious to former worries he had about the labour. He thought he'd be grossed out by the sight of the process and was determined he was not going to cut the chord. But in the end, he was immuned to all of it, as I know he would be and proudly cut the chord and watched his son take his first independent breath.  Now we were both parents, now the true journey begins we thought.

I remember bringing Lachlan home from the hospital. He looked like a little baby doll sitting in the carseat, drowning in a onesie that was way too big for him. Ky-Anh so carefully buckled him in the seat; holding up traffic while a car was waiting for our parking spot. Normally he might rush, but not today. He calmly made sure his new bundle of joy was safe and secure. As he closed the car door he smiled and waved to the cars and proudly said, "Sorry, it is a big day and I'm new at this." He walked with joy in his step to the drivers door and off we went.For months after we arrived home we would find ourselves just standing and staring down into the bassinet at Lachlan. To us, he was perfect and every little smile or passing of gas was adorable.

Now, he is one. He's more independent and exploring the world around him every chance he gets. He's still that happy little baby that we brought home from the hospital... and we certainly have had it easy with him. Lachlan is just a really laid back kid; provide him with food, milk and a book and he'll be content for hours. We are so proud of all his achievements this last year and all the milestones that he was worked so diligently to master. He's securely attached and very affectionate towards others. He's done all right...and mommy and daddy have done all right by him too. I've observed and documented a lot of children's behaviour, but nothing is more rewarding than tracking my own son's. I often think this is how Piaget must have felt while documenting his children's development--pure joy and fascination; they teach us so much, if we are willing to learn.

So happy birthday, Lachlan! You have made your mommy very proud. Perhaps if you read these short, little memoirs some day, you'll be reminded of how much happiness you have brought into my little world. Your father and I will always be there for you, to support you and encourage you as you go through the rest of life's journey. We will hold your hand when you need us and step back when you need to face life's challenges on your own, but we will never be too far away; even if it is just by a phone call. Whatever you decide to become in this life, we will be there for you. We only wish that whatever it is, it will bring you happiness and fulfillment, and goodness to others. This world is full of choices, many not easy to make. There are a lot of challenges you may encounter; inequality, discrimination and injustice; the list could go on. I know that you will rise above them, do what is right and be a better person because of them. I might even disappoint you, as parents sometimes do; mother's aren't perfect either, but our love is; always remember that. I love you and look forward to many more years of sharing this journey together....okay...mommy has to go get a tissue now! ;-)

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